3/9 - Suva and Anne

Though I arrived in Suva on the 8th, I really didn't get into the city until late morning on the 9th. I had planned to meet up with a friend of Rachel Gordon's who currently lives and works in Suva. Anne, Rachel's friend, married a Fijian man she met while in graduate school in Australia. They decided to settle in Fiji for the time-being, since his job there has fairly significant upward potential. 

Before having lunch with her, however, I had to negotiate the Fijian capital. While walking from the bus station to Anne's work, a Fijian man started walking with me, acting friendly and suggesting that I buy a "Bula Fiji" shirt. He spoke confidentially to me, warning me not to trust people, and telling me to keep a tight grip on my wallet (his presence at that moment actually did make me want to grip my wallet tighter), and then told me "all of the shops here are owned by Indians, you should support Fijians!" He then (supposedly to show me where Anne's work was) took me to a "real local" shop, which turned out to also be owned by Indians, and insisted I buy a "Bula Fiji" shirt (a hideous Hawaian-style shirt). I politely declined. He then said he had something for me. Out of a bag he carried, he pulled a mask he said he had carved. He said he would give to me for free. I said I had nowhere to put it, and he finally let me go. Anne told me later that the scam is to convince you to take it, they will ask your name, then begin to carve it into the wood, then expect you to pay for it. And another man (luckily after I had talked to Anne) actually tried this very thing! 

I think that the frustrating thing about these street scams is that not only are you being marked as a dumb tourist, it also played on my sense of connecting with people. There were numerous people I met in Fiji who were kind and helpful, but it's people like these con artists who sour the ability to be easily open. Instead of my asking "how can I get to know you", I find myself asking "what are you trying to get out of me?"

Meeting Anne was wonderful. We chatted over lunch about both her work - she currently works in the development arm of the UN in Fiji, particularly on women's issues - as well as what it was like to be married to a Fijian man. Both conversations tended to center around her difficulties negotiating the latent  (and many times, blatant) sexism in Pacific Islander culture, and in finding ways to communicate across cultures in a way that makes sense to both people. Most inspiring to me was the way that Anne talked about her relationship as something "necessary" for her. She realized that while there were definitely difficult parts of her cross-cultural relationship, it was ultimately satisfying because the differences made her stay awake more.